Tag Archive | trust

Surrender 2017

My word for the year was surrender.

And here I am December 31, 2017 and I am surrendering to the fact that I’m not any closer to knowing what I’m going to write than I was on Jan 1, 2017.

I know that true surrender requires me to relentlessly trust God. It was only through trusting God that I was able to surrender anything these last 12 months.

I used to have a negative connotation of the word surrender because I always thought of loss. Like at the end of a battle when the losing side surrenders to the winner or turning over a possession when you can no longer make the payments to the bank. Those are both situations where surrender is not necessarily voluntary but rather forced. This type of surrender leaves me feeling depressed and discouraged.

I’ve realized though that this is not the surrender that God desires from me. He is not forcing me to bring him my problems. I have the choice to keep them and I hate to admit that I do more often than I should. I’ve learned that surrender can be positive as long as I have the right perspective. For example when I surrender my financial information to a trusted accountant to file my taxes. The burden is then off of me and when I transfer the burden to someone I trust it is a relief.

So why is surrender so difficult? Because it requires me to actively trust God and that is so much harder than I would like to admit. Trusting God requires that I believe what the Bible says about God. That God has good plans for me even when it doesn’t look good. So next year my word is believe! I’m going to focus on believing what I know to be true and not on what I feel. I’ve learned that what I believe is more powerful than what I know and if I’m going to be able to surrender some of my burdens I have to believe!

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Psalm 23 God’s Provision

God has provided me with this house and I am so blessed to have the opportunity to make it my home.

God has provided me with this house and I am so blessed to have the opportunity to make it my home.

The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

he leads me beside quiet waters.

I listened to a  sermon recently that was on Psalm 23 and it was the first 2 verses that intrigued me.

The speaker shared how over in the middle east you don’t find pastures of green grass like we see over here.  Shepherds in that area would spend all day sometimes looking for patches of grass to feed their sheep for that day.  This was not always an easy job for them and finding water for their sheep could be just as challenging.

The Lord is my shepherd so he will find the grass I need for today.  I shall not be in want.  God will never leave me without shelter or food to eat.  So I say and meditated on that………I may not have the latest gadgets or trendy wardrobe but my children and I will be taken care of for the day.  I don’t have to know where our food will come from next week because next week isn’t here and God could lead me to another pasture that I cannot yet see.

I’ve learned to be pretty savvy with my money and manage it wisely.  I have zero credit card debt and own 3 cars which are all paid for.

However I just signed a lease to rent a house because I am being forced to move.  I have to admit I have worried some about this since my income is so little. My motto the last few years leading up to this moment has been that God will provide the perfect house, at the perfect time, at the perfect place, for the perfect price.

Boy did God do that!

God brought me to this little blue house out in the country and it is more than I could’ve ever dreamed of asking for.  But it is exactly what God knew that I needed.  It is so perfect to the tiniest detail that I know it is Gods provision for us.  The challenge for me has been believing that God could bless me with something so wonderful.  I have struggled for so long and when I put the figures down on paper it doesn’t look possible.  I have prayed about it a lot because I really don’t want to make the wrong decision and end up in a bad spot, not to mention I didn’t have the money they were asking for up front…………..God provided though through someone anonymously giving me exactly what I needed to come up with.  That is not something I asked for or even saw coming but it was God providing for me because I am his daughter and he wants to meet my needs if only I have the courage and faith to let him.  I know going into this my expenses will exceed the income that I can bring in and amazingly……. I am not laying in bed at night worrying about what I’m going to do.  Instead I wake up each morning and thank the Lord for blessing me with the opportunity to make this house my home.  I know that there is no need of mine that is too big for God’s wallet.  I may not always like the way that he provides for me but I have learned to be thankful and humble which has given me the privilege of witnessing some miracles that I can now share with others.

I know that there are a lot of Christians out there who would disagree with my decision.  Even Dave Ramsey would have a problem with my decision and would probably say that I need to get another job.  I am not sharing this to justify why I have made this decision but rather to be an example to others of how God has worked in my life through my financial struggles.

My options if I were to find a place with in my budget responsibly speaking would consist of……… living with someone else, government housing,  or finding a small 2 bedroom apt in a bad area of town for me to cram all 4 of us into.  I don’t know about you but I don’t think that if I am God’s princess any of those options are acceptable.

I have spent a good portion of my life working 40+ hours a week just trying to make ends meet.  I did whatever I could to make money in order to provide for my family.  All of the stress of working and keeping up with 4 kids as a single mom wore me out to the point that I couldn’t function.  It seemed that no matter how hard I tried we were barely scraping by.  I sacrificed so much emotionally and spiritually in my life to do what I thought I needed to do.

Now let me clarify here so you don’t get the wrong idea here because I was not working this hard to have 2 fairly new cars and a 4 bedroom house with a nice yard.  I was working this hard to keep 2 old vehicles running and a small 2 bedroom house that was falling apart.  I have spent most of my life time living beneath the poverty level and a lot of time trying to rise above it.

I have seen God’s hand personally in the first part of the scripture in the sense that even though I have been in some tough financial positions I have seen God provide with just enough to cover our needs time and time again.

It is the second part of the scripture here that I am experiencing for probably the first time in my life.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,

That is to rest, to let go, to do nothing???????  Really?

Not just rest but God MAKES me lies down in abundance?  Am I getting this right?

I always believed that in order for God to provide I had to do something like work, or ask the right people for help or even maintain the right relationships………..come on now be honest……. we all have those friends with the pool in the backyard and if you don’t, you are probably that friend with the pool in their backyard.

Ps 23:2 implies that I have to do nothing……

In fact it implies that God insists that I rest and do nothing.  So what if I surrender all my efforts to God and lay down to watch what he does in my life?

As I look back over the last 9 months I can see how God has been forcing me to lie down in green pastures.

Last January I ended up in the Hospital for the second time in 2 years.  It was there that I was told I should apply for SSD.  I told the woman that it was ridiculous and that I could work and had been working.  She looked at me and said

” But you are here because it is not working for you.  If you want to get better you need to take a break from working before it kills you.”

I left the hospital and the thought bounced around inside my head for a few weeks before I decided to go ahead and apply.  I was told by my Doctor “Good Luck!  It will take you like 2 years to get it”  I figure in 2 years I wouldn’t need it so if it was what God wanted he would take care of it.

Long story short here….I did get SSD within 6 months and I saw doors fly open for me on the journey that people said I would have a hard time opening.

SSD is not enough to live on but it helps make ends meet so I can be the mom my children need me to be.  I have been learning through all of this that it is not me who earns the money but rather God who provides it.

Just like the green grass just for today I have what I need for each day and I may not know about tomorrow but I have total confidence in my shepherds ability to lead me to the green pastures that I need.

I’ve learned that when something crosses my path whether it is an opportunity to work or way to get assistance I listen to the promptings of my spirit.  Some times God even places people in my path with whom I can share my story with.  I’ve found that sharing my struggles allows others to reach out and meet a need that I have.  This type of experience can be quite humbling and I am learning to not be ashamed of my situations but to be open to allowing God to use them so that He can be Glorified through my unpleasant situations.  All of this takes a willingness on my part to be vulnerable before others and is something that can be risky but for me that risk has paid off on more than one occasion.

I just want to encourage you today to ask yourself if your overworked or if the numbers on the paper are in red……..

Take the time to rest before God forces you to and listen to the directions he gives you not the words of the world.

All the “shouda, coulda’s and what if’s” aren’t going to help you but God can lead you out of your situation if you listen and follow.

Disclaimer…..I am not saying to go buy a boat when you don’t have the money and expect God to pay for it or lead you to someone who will give you the money for it.  But if you want a boat pray about it and talk to people.  God just might surprise you and send someone across your path that is willing to give you a boat.

I am saying that if you don’t see how your going to meet the basic needs of your family you can trust God.  He is faithful and he wants to provide for you if you just let go and give him the control.

Scruff of the Neck and Out of the Fire

Talk about a wild winter!   Who’s ready for some heat?

I think most everyone is a little tired of this snow and cold.

Everyone except me……

I’ve been quiet on my blog for almost 4 months and I’m sure some are wondering what happened to me.  So I thought it was time to share now that I have some answers.

I’ve been on a journey that has not been very fun.  Some people in my life have been hurt and I’m terribly sorry for that, but on the flip side I am not sorry for the things I’ve done or said.  I know that it must puzzle some of you reading this to try and understand but if you go back to my post titled “Balloons of Hope” you might get a better understanding of what I’m going to share.

I finally succeeded in popping that balloon that just didn’t want to pop.  The one you can bounce on ridiculously and it just expands to move the air out a different side.  Well I finally popped it and all the others that I thought would help my situation.  The only one I had left was God’s balloon and since it was tied to my belt loop there was no escaping when I got into some trouble back in December.

I felt like God picked me by the scruff of my neck and pulled me out of the fire.  He then set me down and told me to stop trying to jump over the flames.  That is easier said than done when you don’t see another way.  God then picked me up and began to carry me back across the burning coals toward the flames.  I was terrified as I could see the flames as we began to walk past and sometimes I even feel the heat, but I’m not burned.  It’s not always comfortable but Gods got me wrapped up in his arms protecting me as we walk through this furnace.  I didn’t create the furnace and neither did God, but I do have to get through it to get to the other side.  Sometimes I get anxious and try to do it myself but I’ve learned that if I continue to try to cross this furnace by myself I will keep falling short into the flames and will have to start all over again with a new set of burns.

Fires can be just like the balloons in life.  Balloons are good things that come along and give me hope but they can also distract me from my hope in God.  The fires though are challenges that can appear much scary than they really are.  If I allow my fear to overcome me and try to avoid them I will always wind up smack dab in the middle unable to see.  But I do know one thing for sure and that’s that God is faithful and will rescue me every time.

I have had situations in my life where I’ve gotten burned from jumping and I didn’t even realize I was jumping over a situation.  That has been my life for the last year or maybe even 2.  I didn’t even see the fire or even realize I was crossing it.  I could feel it and I knew it was there but I didn’t understand because I couldn’t see.  There were a few people in my life that I was screaming at in desperation for help but since I couldn’t see where I was  or the danger I was in…. I didn’t know what to ask for.  Instead, for the first time in my life, I screamed wildly and out of control lost in the dark billowing smoke.  I don’t know if all the people I hurt could see my situation and if they knew where I was but I hope they know that I’m sorry.

It’s taken a long time but I finally found the light.  The last 4 months God has been shining the light around showing me just where I have been and what I have been in the midst of.  He’s shown me how much danger there has been and how much he has saved me from.  So to say that I’m sorry for the things I’ve done would be wrong because if I hadn’t done or said them I wouldn’t know where I am today.  I would still be lost, feeling the excruciating pain of the flames I couldn’t see.  So if you feel like God’s got you by the scruff of the neck perhaps it’s time to relax and let him lead you out of the fire so he can show you where you’ve been and where you’re going to go.

Psalm 27:5

For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling.

The One Thing

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I was sitting at my kitchen table eating dinner with my youngest daughter who is now eight years old.  She is the youngest of my four kids and on this particular night we were on our own since the other three were off with extra curricular activities.  As I sat there watching her eat I began to wonder if I was doing what I needed to with her.  Was I teaching her the most important thing?  I have been so busy in her little life with her siblings that I really haven’t had the time I wish I had.  I have ten years left with her and then she is off to college.

What is the one thing I want to her to know when she leaves?  What is the one thing I would want her to know if I died tomorrow?  What is the one thing I would like her to achieve?  I know these are deep questions to ask yourself over dinner with a little girl but they are questions I think every parent should ask themselves at some point before it’s too late.

I sat there pondering my own questions.  The one thing that I would like her to know before she goes off to college is that God loves her, faults included and will never leave her because he gives her more grace than she could possibly need to cover any mistakes she may make.

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The one thing I would want her to know if I were to die tomorrow…..

That I loved God more than anything in this world and to know that I had an intimate relationship with my Savior.

The one thing I would like to see her achieve…..

I long to see her develop a personal relationship with God that will carry her through life’s worst trials.

Nothing else really matters.

If she goes to college or goes to work.  Does she get married or have kids?  Or how about the harder things like does she drink, smoke or do drugs?  What if she screws up and gets arrested or even pregnant.  It doesn’t really matter because I know that God will use the negative to draw her closer to him and the positive to bless her.

I hear of how some parents have a very difficult time “letting go” of their children. Letting go was something I had to do when I had my first child nearly 17 yrs ago.  I remember that night clearly as if it were yesterday.  It was my first night home from the hospital and I was up feeding her in the middle of the night.  As I sat there looking down upon her tiny little hands, listening to the sweet sound of her breathing I began to wonder what on earth was I thinking?  I had wanted her so badly and now that she was here, I wanted her to die.  The thought mortified me at the time but it made perfect sense…..Here was this baby that I waited in anticipation for nine months and now I had fallen in love with her more than I could have ever imagined.  I wanted her to be safe and I knew that the world was not safe.  In fact I knew that it was a guarantee that she would suffer.  I would not be able to protect her and I loved her so much that I couldn’t stand the thought of watching her in pain.  I prayed that night and asked God to please take her home before anything could happen to her.  I didn’t want her to suffer and I was willing to lose her if that meant she would go to heaven.

God answered my prayer that night.  It was not the answer I wanted but it was an answer.

He said “Monica think about how much you love this child…How much more do you think that I love her?  Do you not think that the one thing I want for her is to come home?  Do you really think that I want to see her suffer?  It is not your right to decide when she comes home.  She is not yours she is mine and I have claimed her from conception just as I have claimed you. I have entrusted you with her for this moment in time and I will protect her because I know you can’t.  I am trusting you with her now so I need you to trust that I know what I’m doing”

That night I let go of all my rights to her and handed them over to God.  I did it with my other three children before they were ever born.  I don’t look at them as my children but as little souls that God has entrusted me with.  I gave all control to God and promised God that I would do my best to do that one thing……To teach them to love God.

So as I sat there at the dinner table with my youngest I was questioning whether I was really doing my best to teach her to love God.  Watching her eat I asked her “Christy who is your best friend?”

She looked at me and nonchalantly said “Elise is Mommy” she paused and said “no! no! she is my second bestest friend”

Curious I was looking at her expecting her to name one of her friends from school.  But she surprised me and said “God is my first best friend!”

I smiled at her and said “your right honey he is the best friend you could possibly have”

I said nothing more.

I may not have had a ton of time to spend with her reading bible stories but what I have done is lived it out for her.  How I have chosen to live my life has had a bigger impact on my children than anything else.  She went to VBS this last week and one of the things the teacher there had her do was write a note telling your Mom what one of her talents are.

I have posted pictures of the little notes I have received from her because they are so much sweeter when you view them in her handwriting.

ImageSimple words that spoke volumes to my heart.

Simple words that told me what her heart sees

Simple words are all it takes!

Finding Purpose

I am determined to find the purpose in all things good and bad.  If I can find purpose in the bad it gets me through the pain of suffering.  So often it is easy to find purpose in the good but when life hurts we simply tell ourselves “God has a purpose” without actually considering the purpose.  I don’t know how many times I’ve told myself that very thing.

  God has a purpose.

  My life is falling a part, I can’t pay the bills, a loved one is sick, I lost my job, my kids are not as good as I think they should be.  I could go on and on with all the things that don’t go our way but honestly we all have them.  Each one is a little different and unique to each one of us.  Every single one of those difficulties molds us into who we are.  If I had not gone through some of the sufferings that I have had, I would not be the person I am today. 

In fact I would not be able to stand today.  I would be crushed under the the burden I currently carry.  I can carry it though because of the what I have been through.  Each one of those struggles have played a part in making me   I can carry today’s struggles because of yesterdays sufferings.  It has made me strong enough to do what God has called me to do and to be who he wants me to be at this point in my life. 

The interesting thing I have been learning through all of this is that the stronger I get the BIGGER the burden I am given to carry.  The BIGGER the burden the easier it is.  I know it doesn’t make sense.  You would think that the bigger the burden the more difficult it would be.  With God though it is different.  With each struggle our faith and trust in God grow making us stronger in turn making ALL trials easier to walk through no matter what the size.

PhiIippians 4:13

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

God’s Dare

This year has turned out to be a very difficult one.  Back in January I could see the hurricane off the coast of my heart, having never seen one this size before I began to panic.  I did things and said things that probably didn’t make any sense but it was my desperate attempt to find answers to the questions spinning within my heart.  It was during this time as the winds of change were beating against my soul that God spoke to me so clearly it was as if he was sitting on the couch beside me.  Being the writer that I am, I instinctively picked up my journal and began to write out the words God tenderly spoke into my heart.

My Beloved,

I dare you to love me,

to follow me,

be an example of me,

to show others who I am through your actions.

No!  I won’t say that it will  be easy,

in fact it will be the hardest thing you do.

But don’t worry.

I will be there with you,

guiding your every step, opening and closing doors as you go.

The people who help you will be attacked,

some will prevail…… because they see me in you.

Some….. will walk away,

giving up the chance to see my glory.

I will redeem you… just as I’ve promised,

I will cradle you in my arms just as your heart longs to be.

No!

You are not crazy or weak minded, in fact you are the opposite.

The battle you fight is intense and you are strong,

do not be discouraged for I will lift you up.

I will carry the yoke for you.

Trust in me and let my love wash away your fears.

Real fears,

fears of past, present, and future.

I know the reality you face,

so step into  my love and grace,

experience the peace I have for you.

Remember……. you are mine and I am yours.

Nothing can take that away from you.

Sure,

you could walk away…. but I know you won’t,

I know this because I know your heart better than you do.

You do love me, believe in me and trust me with your whole being.

You may not feel like it but you are.

You need to believe you are everything I need you to be.

  Have faith in the unseen and know that my love washes over you,

cascading over every jagged rock in your heart,

I am making them smooth so you’ll shine like a diamond.

Strong enough to withstand everything yet crystal clear so people can see me in you.

You are my daughter, my bride, my love.

I love you more than you can conceive.

Don’t forget that in the struggles that lay ahead.

Your Father in Heaven

Written Feb 7,2013

My heart survived the first part of the hurricane and entered the eye of the storm.  Relieved I began to look at the damage left behind and attempted to make repairs before the rest of the storm arrived.  I did what I could to prepare for round two but to be honest I wasn’t looking so good.  I placed a smile on my face and picked up the motto “grin and bear it”.   I began chanting in my head ” I think I can! I think I can! I think I can!

The eye of the storm settled in and I discovered it can be quite deceiving.  The calmness can trick a person into thinking the storm has passed but a seasoned person knows the second round is inevitable, the only way out is to go through the swirling winds and rain again.  Waiting for its arrival, when the memory of swirling winds and drowning rain are fresh in your mind is torture.….I couldn’t handle the waiting game when I could see it coming.  I took off running headlong outside and threw myself into the wind and pelting rain.  I didn’t care how hurt I would be afterwards, I just wanted to get to the other side of the storm and I was going to fight my way there.  The winds of change have picked me up and I’m flying through the air now with common things turned deadly.  Open to the elements and exposed to the wrath of the storm I close my eyes and cry out to God “is it too late?”  I can’t go back that I know, but the fear has my eyes tightly closed because the sight before me is too much for my battered heart to take.  My self destructive nature has once more taken over.  I try to breathe as the lies spin me in circles.  I reach for something to grab onto and for a second I’ve got it.  Then the winds of doubt rip it from my grasp as I fight to keep my heart beating.  Trust God, Trust God I chant within me.  I open my eyes for a second and catch a glimpse of God through the storm,  He tells me “on purpose”.   On purpose!   I ponder in my mind its meaning.  Is it meant for me?  He knew I was going to run into the storm, He knew I couldn’t sit there and wait for what I saw was inevitable to happen.  He knew I would self destruct and take matters into my own hands to make it happen.  It was all on purpose!   He has a plan for me that I cannot see right now.  I remember his dare to me and the spoken words are what will carry me through the rest of this storm.  I don’t know who will be left standing beside me when its over but I do know my shattered heart is in his hands.

I’m not sure I believe redemption is possible for me here on earth….even when my feet touch the ground again.  I do believe that I will find it in heaven and no one can take that away from me.  I will not justify my reasons for running into the storm, nor will I let my scars define who I am when its all over.  I also will not allow the pain to cripple me but rather use it to fuel my passion to fight, not for me but for His PURPOSE!

Truth of My Heart

Dear God,

Here I am, I have nothing left within me, not even self-respect. 

Pain engulfs every facet of my being. 

Desires torture me endlessly.

  Please take them far away from me.

Why should I want, what I can never have?

You are all I can and should have.

It’s you and me bonded together for eternity.

Selfishness grips my soul and I long to kill all that is in me.  

  My sin is repulsive

How could I possibly be an example of you?

All I want is you…… but I keep falling short of your grace. 

You tell me who I am…. but I don’t see it.

I see an ugly, sinful, wounded heart. You see a whole, sinless, pure heart.

I can’t possibly be both. 

If I am to act like you see me and how you want me to be then I feel fake

as if I am deceiving to those around me.

  But if I am true to how I feel then no one should see me.

Pick me up and carry me please

Speak to me and guide my every step

Give me the words to say for I do not know the truth of my heart

The mirrors within me are but an illusion

I am lost and confused

I cannot find my way out

You though can save me,  cover me with your blood

Restore my heart and heal its brokenness

Protect my spirit so I may sing of your glory

Your daughter forever,

I don’t know where I’m going on this journey called life.  I’ve been told so many things lately and quite frankly I’m not sure I agree with any of them.  What I do know is that God loves me.  He hears my every cry and knows every pain of my heart.  No one will ever know me like he does.  God has met my needs most of the time by complete strangers who nothing of my story.  Their compassion for me amazes me every time.  I think God likes to do that so I know without a doubt that he is the one who meets my needs not the people around me who know my situation.  When I pray for something that no one else knows about and  God rises to meet that need my faith grows, not in people but in God.  When I tell people my pain or my needs I find myself looking to them to meet needs that no one other than God can possibly meet.  I know there are a lot of people who would disagree with this but if your listening to the spirit he will ask things of you that don’t make sense,  like stopping at a random house to see someone you don’t know so he can use you.  The number of times that I have spontaneously taken of my abundance and shared it with others has been countless.  I have had no knowledge of their need so when I find out later how much it really blessed them and how they were praying for it,  I am encouraged to keep stepping out for the sake of the call.  I don’t need people to know my pain in order for God to take care of me.  I just need to trust God and be real with him,  hiding nothing from him in the corners of my heart.

oh me. love.   # Pinterest++ for iPad #

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Sunrise In The Morning

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I was driving down the road yesterday and looking out my windshield all I could see were the dreary clouds that had been there all day long.  It had been a rather depressing day and I’m quite sure the weather here in NW Ohio did its share to contribute to my mood. 

I had spent most of the day talking to God about my situation and no matter how hard I tried to listen I just wasn’t hearing anything back.  Some people have told me that God is always speaking to us and its simply a matter of us stopping to listen.  I don’t know if that is true cause I sure was trying to hear what he was saying to me all afternoon and no matter how quiet I was or how still I was I just wasn’t hearing it.  By the time I got home from work and started running my kids every where they needed to go, I had pretty much given up on God responding to my inquiries about the storms in my life.  Normally it seems like God is constantly talking to me, but when I want to hear him the most he seems silent.  I was thinking that perhaps I simply don’t want to hear what he is saying so I discredit him by telling myself that its not God speaking its my own thought running around inside my head.  On this particular day though I could not even come up with a thought of my own.  I was simply pleading with God that I just don’t see how it is going to work or where I am supposed to go.  I felt lost and his silence was disheartening.  I kept telling myself over and over to just trust him, that’s all I can do right now and pretty much all I have to go on at this point.

So as I was driving my daughter to practice, I couldn’t help but notice how dreary the sky was looking.  I was so disappointed because one of my favorite times of day is watching the sunset, the other is watching the sunrise while I run down the trail. This night though  there was not going to be a sunset to see.  God heard me though and for the first time all day he spoke to me. 

My dear child just because you can’t see the sunset behind the stormy skies doesn’t mean you won’t bear witness to a beautiful sunrise in the morning.  You may only see the dreary clouds in your future right now but just like the sunrise you will soon see a beautiful sunrise in your life.  Continue to trust in me as you have and know that I do and always will have things under control,  Nothing that happens is with out my knowing.  I don’t cause it but I do use circumstances to reveal my greatness to the lost souls who bear witness to my wonders.

Wow! Ok. God I feel sheepishly small right now.  How impatient and demanding I was earlier today.  I don’t have to see the gorgeous sunset behind the clouds to know that it is there.  I know its there I just can’t see it.  I have to know in the same sense that my life will be beautiful again when I reach the other side of these stormy skies.   I also learned that it was  when I surrendered my worries to God and left them in his hands that my mind quieted.  It was then and when I least expected it that I heard God speak to me.  I’m still not sure he is always talking and that it is a matter of us just listening.  I do think though that he waits until we are truly done with our ranting, pleading and pity parties.  When we have surrendered ourselves to what he has to say then he will speak because he knows we are ready to listen and accept what he has to say. 

Isaiah42:16

I will lead the blind by ways they have not known, along unfamiliar paths I will guide them; I will turn the darkness into light before them and make the rough places smooth.  These are the things I will do; For I will not forsake them.